It’s only been a week since you broke up with the love of your life – and he’s already dating somebody else…well, prowling his every move just became as easy as pie. With Facebook’s new app, now the broken-hearted can keep tabs on their ex-flames – without even logging into the popular social network. It’s true: Facebook has officially – once again – revolutionized the craft of shadowing both friends and foes – and their partners – with The Breakup Notifier.

The new, DIY stalking app will alert you via email of relationship status updates for particular friends, genders, or groups of friends as assigned by you on Facebook. Yes, it’s that easy: simply Log in to Facebook, choose the friends whose relationships statuses you need to keep abreast of – et voila – the only thing you have to do now is wait for trouble in paradise (which is probably the hardest part). You can think of the new app as an alarm clock for your heart. As soon as Jake drops his most recent flavor of the month, The Breakup Notifier will let you know he’s back on the market.

The new app isn’t just for fatally-attracted lovers. Concerned (or perhaps snoopy) friends and relatives can use it too – and parents, of course, will find the app useful for keeping tabs on their kids and their latest hormone-driven shenanigans. In addition, the LGBT community will find it helpful, since Facebook recently added “Civil Unions and Domestic Partnerships” to its litany of relationship status-options for users to choose from. Thus, you can consider The Breakup Notifier a tool for lovers of all sexual preferences.

Single people and the paired-up alike will be glad to know that “stalking” via the social network may actually be a productive thing to do – recent statistics show that social media sites offer a legit launching pad for budding relationships. But paramours beware: statistics also indicate that Facebook may in fact be more addictive than sex.

No matter what device you are using to check up on old flames and assess prospective suitors, make sure to safeguard it with a warranty from CPS – you don’t want to miss your window of opportunity for a good hook, line and sinker.